Too Many Grapes

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Today I had a discussion with my husband about one of those Facebook posted quiz type of things that involved picking a photo of different doors.  I picked one and quickly looked up my "reading".  I thought, oh okay and went on.  My husband had this sent to him and he picked a door.  He asked me what door I picked and I told him.  His next comment surprised me "boy they really nailed you".  Confused (because I already forgot what my door had to say about me...I usually let these things kind of run off)  he proceeded to tell me what my door said about me. As it turned out he was right.  He goes on that I always have my fingers in something.  Something you want to do.  Doing something that matters. You juggle a full bowl. Wow.

A recent incident, which had nothing to do with the story of the doors, came to mind.  I love grapes and I was getting down to the grapes that are at the bottom of the bag.  I kept grabbing and I kept loosing them.  No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't seem to grab the amount I wanted. I realized it wasn't working. While I was trying to pick up many grapes, my fingers were busy holding what few I had in my hand.  Taking the bag out I opened up my hand and placed each grape, one at a time, into my open cupped hand. 

It really was working too hard.  I was not finding the answer. I was trying to push those grapes into my fisted hand.  If I had relaxed my hand, I would be able to put each grape in my palm; in a planned and deliberate manner.  My life is like this.  Feel free to slap my hand.

Several years ago I decided to start a "bucket list".  Nothing way out there just things like visiting Martha's Vineyard.  Another was going to Bar Harbor Maine.  Being a New Englander it was something every New Englander needs to do.  Another was trying oil painting.  One turned out better than the other.  But, it was planned.

When I start overloading anything it catches up.  I am pretty good about evaluating my time (after years of juggling, I am better) but reining in my desires is another thing.  I desire to have a full bucket of things!  I am not saying that people should not live this way, only you can judge that.  What I am saying is that when you get to a certain age you need to realize you are not a young woman who has unlimited time in front of me.  This is me, you may be perfectly fine and going like a Ever Ready Bunny.  I cannot and in fact I really never could. 

Back to the grapes.  When I lessened my grip I was able to get even more grapes than I wanted! 

Going through life we will have a few grapes that roll off.  Looking at my life I will always have things I want to try to do.  Things I may fail, but I need to remember nothing comes to you without trying.  For those times when I have reached failure (I really have to tell you about my venture into oil painting) I can dust myself off and go on. For me, success was not necessarily, but trying was.

I am a child of God, and I have been led by His leanings.  I have come to the conclusion that I needed to reach out to be the person God wants me to be and the paths He will lead me down.  Some paths will turn out great, some will be learning lessons (like oil paint in my hair) It is when those situations are looked upon as lessons, you can smile.  No failures, just an ambition to try.

So, friends take each idea and dream (grapes) and place them in your open hands (or maybe in one of those buckets) and be deliberate.  What comes out may not be what you planned but is what you need.  

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