Those Bloody Pomegranates

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Okay, so I have never had a pomegranate.  This time of year I see them everywhere.  Strange and somewhat mysterious, I had an adventurous moment while shopping and picked one up. 

Now I love the taste of pomegranate, but to eat a fresh one, I was in for a surprise.

The fruit was huge.  It was about the size of a soft ball.  Smooth and although its skin is peel-able (who knew) Chris and I decided to take a knife to cut it in half and then figure out how to attack it.  What a mistake.

On a white cutting board, we cut the strange fruit into half, meanwhile creating a splatter of about five feet.  All the while the red juice began to flow freely on the cutting board.  It looked like we just massacred a living thing. 

It became clear that the “seeds” or what ever they are called held all that fruity pleasure.  Armed with paper towels we stared to break apart the fruit.  What was revealed were little “bags” about the size of corn kernels.  Inside each kernel was a seed.  It was like eating crunchy corn on the cob.  A strange sensation of sweet, sour and crunch.  Not that I totally disliked it, the red juices continued flow down my arms as I was still trying to figure out the best way to eat this.

Should I dig in like an orange?  Well, that produced loads of juice, which flowed everywhere.

Finally I realized that popping each kernel out was much cleaner.  So, we began to break away pieces and chew, and chew, and chew.  My poor jaw was sore by the time I was finished with my half!

Now this may be the nectar of the gods, but the work of it all was just plain embarrassing.  Finally, after about a half hour we had finished making a mess, I mean eating.

The next day I found spots of juice everywhere from the plants to my collection of cows.

I now appreciate why the juice is so expensive.

For this adventurous gal, I will leave eating the pomegranate to those who cherish the experience.  As for me, give me a bottle of Pom and a couple of ice cubes...now that is my idea of nirvana.

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A Christmas Goodie! GINNY'S RASPBERRY TRUFFLES

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 GINNY'S RASPBERRY TRUFFLES- can you say YUMMY!!!!!

Back in 2004 I won second place in Hershey's "I resolve to eat more chocolate" contest and I thought I would share that recipe with you.  Now, these are easy to make but I do have one change.  Back when I made these Hershey's had raspberry chocolate chips you could buy.  They have been harder and harder to fined and now even on the company website they are not in stock.  My resolve to continue is to use Raspberry Flavored Oil.  DO NOT USE EXTRACT.  You can just use milk chocolate chips without the flavoring, but it does make a taste difference.  So, if you plan on making these, a couple of things.

1.  Plan to make them at least one week (two weeks are better) before giving, so that you can let them "mellow" if you use the liqueur. 

2.  DO NOT USE EXTRACT.  Extract has water in it and it will make the chocolate seize, (make it into one horrendous lump) and will not be able to be handled properly.

3.  Raspberry oil can be find in better cake supply places and always at candy supply places.  It is a candy flavoring, which makes it safe to use.  A little goes a long, long way.  So, for a $3 investment you have quite a few batches.

All that being said, the recipe is very easy.


GINNY'S RASPBERRY TRUFFLES

2 cups HERSHEY'S® Milk Chocolate Chips

1 2/3 cups Hershey's® Raspberry Chips (or substitute semi-sweet chocolate and use raspberry OIL)

6 tablespoons unsalted butter

1 (10 ounce) jar seedless raspberry jam

2 tablespoons raspberry liqueur OR 1 teaspoon raspberry candy flavoring (Raspberry OIL)

5 tablespoons whipping cream,or as needed (humidity is the factor for the "as needed")  You really want to make them hard, but pliable enough to handle and roll without melting too much

Coatings (powdered sugar,cocoa, toasted coconut or chopped nuts) I LOVE chocolate or white jimmies (sprinkles for you non New Englanders!)


DIRECTIONS

1  Place chocolate chips, raspberry chips (or semi sweet chips and Raspberry oil) and butter in large microwave-safe bowl. Microwave at HIGH (100%) 1 minute; stir. If necessary, microwave at HIGH an additional 15 seconds at a time, stirring after each heating, until chocolate is melted and mixture is smooth when stirred. Stir in jam, liqueur and 4 tablespoons whipping cream. If necessary, add additional whipping cream, one half teaspoon at a time, until mixture is well blended and smooth.

2  Cover; refrigerate several hours or overnight until chocolate mixture is firm enough to handle. Roll mixture into 1-inch balls; while still tacky roll in your choice of coating. Place coated truffle on cookie sheet to set. Refrigerate several hours or until completely cold; transfer to airtight container. Store in cool, dry place. Candy flavor is best after storing for about 1 week. Truffles also freeze well.

Enjoy!  Many do! LOL

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Starting Early, Amen!

Well it is now officially November and I feel a bit better about my confessions.... I've been listening to Christmas music and picking out my Christmas crafts since the beginning of October!

I wanted to take a moment to share a favorite website which has a ton of ebooks you can download (just but ebook in the search).  At http://www.favecrafts.com/  you will find so many crafts you can never say there isn't something that you cannot "make" for the holidays!  I like to do easy crafts for our church fair and in past I have also done a Christmas craft with the children at the church.  I have to plan on two levels... the very young (which I learned last year NEVER give a child a glitter glue bottle!) and the older ones which range from 10-13.  I've even done things with the youth (a button wreath) which has proved fun.  They can easily use glue guns and can take directions well.  Well, at favecrafts.com you can find it all!

I am planning on making several homemade gifts this year.  I have made November my painting month (I am a decorative painter) and December is my baking month.  It just seems right this year.  Buying gifts is fine, but sometimes I like to give a little more of "me" and this year is the year!

My second "confession" is listening to Christmas music.  I have already gotten three new Christmas CD's.  Some I like more than others.  Here is my humble review of the three I've gotten so far.

1.  Wilson Phillips Christmas in Harmony.  I was thrilled to see them do a new CD.  I was big fans years ago when they were together.  I liked most of the music on this.  Their voices were wonderful (as usual) and they had a nice selection of old tunes.  The arrangements though were a little off for me.  But, I don't regret the purchase.  The Beach Boys was certainly an influence

2.  Point of Grace Home for the Holidays.  I love their harmonies as well!  They have another CD Tennessee Christmas: A Holiday Collection, which I did like more.  I tend to be a traditionalist.  The one song that I was intrigued with was Not So Silent Night.  It was lovely and like a poem.  Labor of Love was well, a bit different.  The second verse mentions blood on the ground.  It caught me a bit off guard.  Although I have to admit I did listen to every word after that. These ladies are great; Christmas music and their other CD's as well.

3.  Celtic Thunder Christmas.  Of the three I was disappointed in this.  I have come to love the harmonies of all the voices but in this CD they played up the individuals.  Not that they have bad independent voices, but I really wanted to hear ALL the voices. 

I am expecting Susan Boyle and I will review that when I get it.  Also, I am planning on writing about my recent trip to Savannah Georgia!  It will take a bit to get that one together, but I will post it. (between painting and such!)

Well, that is it for the moment.  Enjoy the autumn season.... although I love the "feelings" of Christmas, ice storms I do not! LOL.  After Christmas I have no use at all for snow and I am ready for spring by the end of January. 

I must start practicing being in the moment and treasuring each moment more!!!!

Autumn "Nesting" and Apple Caramel Focaccia

 I love this time of year!  I seem to want to settle in and cook, bake and experiment with new recipes.  I go through the thousands (I am not kidding) of cookbooks I have at hand and I try new "old" recipes (from my vintage collections) and new "new" ones from the likes of Taste of Home. 

Something about when the weather starts to chill, but isn't cold.  You sort of nest and you begin to think about harvest.  Maybe it is my good old New England roots, but it comes naturally around autumn for me.  All the smells of apples, pumpkin, cinnamon gets my mouth to watering and my mind to working.

Always on the prowl, I find many recipes that I keep to prepare later.  Drives hubby crazy!  Sometimes I get to them, sometimes I alter them to being unrecognizable in their original form.  But, that is what I do as a creative cook and recipe developer.

You will get a taste of that from me here at this blog.  One of my many interest, as well as painting and writing.  You could say I am "full brain" dominant... for another time .....  Anyway.
  
I came across this recipe and it looked so fall like!  Something a little special but oh-so-easy to prepare.  I have adapted to my own flavors (like any good cook) So, I share! ;-)

Apple Caramel Focaccia  Serves 12

1 frozen bread dough, thawed (1 pound)
1/4 cup of melted butter
2 cups of THINLY sliced apples that have been peeled and cored.  I think Mac's are a little too soft, so Cortland is often my apple of choice, particularly when there is loads of sugar elsewhere in the recipe
1/8 cup brown sugar, packed
1/8 cup of white sugar
1 Tablespoon of cinnamon
1/8 Teaspoon each nutmeg, allspice, ground cloves
1/4 to 1/2 small chopped nuts now the recipe called for walnuts but caramel and pecans???? yumm
1/4 cup of jarred Caramel Sundae topping


Preheat oven to 350

Spray a large baking sheet with Pam, set aside.  On a floured surface work the thawed loaf into a circle (or the best you can) to about 12 inches in diameter.  Transfer to the baking sheet.

In a bowl mix apples slices with sugars, spices and nuts.

Brush dough with melted butter (save some butter, as when it comes out of the oven you will brush MORE butter...can you say Paula Deen????... on the top.  Spread the apple mixture over the top.

Bake in the preheated oven for 30-40 minutes until the apples seem tender and the dough is browned golden.  Remove from oven and brush with remaining butter.

While warm, drizzle a bit  of the caramel topping over the Focaccia, cool a bit more (20 minutes)on a wire rack, (and put jar of caramel in refrigerator for about a half hour too) and drizzle MORE caramel on top.  The double layering is yummmmmmy.

Slice and serve!


JUST IN CASE YOU ARE CURIOUS ABOUT FOCACCIA

 From my favorite folks at Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia:
Focaccia (Italian pronunciation: [foˈkatʃːa]) is a flat oven-baked Italian bread,^[1] which may be topped with herbs or other ingredients.
Focaccia is related to pizza, but not considered to be the same.

Ah, Fall and the Woes of Allergy Season!

Well, folks, I did find out why I was such in a "bum" mood.  Allergies!  By noon that day I was wearing a sweat shirt with a hood (and it is still in the 70's here) and I also just could not get warm.  I started to freeze!  Well, as luck would have it I also started to sniffle.  Now, I am a gal who doesn't get colds real often, and when I do I sometimes start barking (coughing) like a dog, and that is something I find terribly embarrassing.  I "woof", "woof" for weeks, and it often becomes bronchitis.  So, off I went and took my Aire Bourne fizzy, a hit off my nose spray and  gulp  of some purple allergy meds.  Lasted about 12 hours and I was back on my feet, sneezing but feeling much better.

Oh, how cruel a world that makes such a beautiful autumn to fill it with allergens! 

It is now days later and I am still wearing my hoodie, but I at least know why I am feeling the way I do!

I don't know about you, but I get all flustered if I cannot figure out why I don't feel good, either physically or mentally.

For me I will very often get a double whammy and when I feel lousy I also feel down.  There is something to be said about pulling yourself up by the boot straps though.

So, how does one do that?  I think it is different for everyone.  What may work for me, doesn't work for others.  But, here are a few things that I have used that will let me move forward.

1.  Give yourself permission to get some rest.  Hey, when you are absolutely freezing and even your legs are cold, you know something is up.  Your body is telling you it needs to mend and rest.  I am not saying crawl into bed for 24 hours, but what I am saying is allow yourself an hour or two to try to address the immediate issue.  For me I cover in a cozy quilt and put on the electric fireplace/heater and watch TV for an hour.  I often sleep as well. 

2.  After a rest, I get up and say to myself "this isn't a cold" (can you say either self denial or positive thinking?!)  Point is you gave your body something, now let's see where it takes you.

3.  Tell people.  Oh, how many martyrs out there?!?!?!?  "Oh I am fine......" as your eyes look downward and the words whine a bit at the end.  Be realistic and say, 'I am not feeling too well right now, so I am a bit low key".

4.  Prepare others.  If you cannot make dinner the easiest way to feel better about it is to make sure you have something in mind that is easy for people to prepare and feed themselves.  Now, I am not saying my husband is incapable, in fact he very often has had to pinch hit meals.  What I am saying that as a mom, you may be sending a signal that you need some "mom time" and still not get the kids to get overly concerned about it.

5.  Can you say Tuna Fish sandwich?

6.  Smile.  Unless you have meningitis, be grateful.

7.  Medicate.  How  often I have talked to someone, including hubby saying...did you take something for the headache?  No..... well don't whine.  Take the meds then let me know how you feel.  Take your own advice and DO IT.

8.  Drink plenty of fluids.  I am always drinking water, COLD ice water.  You would think that this would be the last thing I would drink if I was cold.  I still do, for health reasons, but there is no reason I can't have a nice cup of instant Chai tea afterward.

9.  Go to bed early.  Or even stay on the couch!  Point is be prepared to put some sleep into being sick.

10.  Don't go to work.  For years I managed about 12-15 people and it would drive me crazy when someone would come into work hacking, sneezing, blowing their nose and "spreading the wealth" so to speak.  Don't go, simply don't go.  No person is irreplaceable for one day.  Also, if you think you are that important, then let them know you can be reached by phone.  Point is YOU are to take care of yourself, so you therefore do not pose a health risk to others.

11.  Finally, know that tomorrow is another chance for a better day.  It is one day in your busy life, but in the scheme of things it is a blip in your timeline.  So, do you really want to stay miserable????


Well, there you go.  Take what you want and leave the rest.  I am not an expert by any means but I am a babbler.


Take care folks, stay healthy and know that you have the right to self heal better than anyone out there!

Bum.....

I feel like a bum today.  Here I sit in my exercise pants, a tee, white socks and the only adornment on me is a headband that I am using because my hair is so darn drab and flat.

I wonder sometimes if other people feel this way.  I got to say it may be a bit to easy for me to do this because I do not work outside the house.

There is a crispness in the air, fall weather is finally arriving.  I wonder how long we will be able to use the new outside patio before the weather settles in.  I look out the window next to the computer onto the shade garden, still lush and green.  I begin to have thoughts of everything dying down...... 

Don't get me wrong , I love fall.  The autumn is "my time" of year.  My favorite, weather wise.  Here in New England the mornings are chilly (60's) and as the sun comes out it warms up nicely.  There are very often breezes that will float through the rooms from open windows.  Then in the evening it starts to cool.  The breezes die down and it takes one more cover on the bed to sleep comfortably.  The sky is so blue and the clouds have a certain look about them in the fall.  They build sideways instead of up and you can see it from the highway as all the clouds seem to have flat bottoms and some are clustered and some stand alone.  The air smells like, well nothing.  Until leaf burning season.

But, I must admit something has got me today.  I am not usually so disengaged.  But, yet I am.  Very often I can self diagnose myself and find a reason for the lack of energy and joy, but I am thinking today it may take some time. 

So, this morning I woke up around 5, let the dogs out, fed them and went back to sleep for a while.  I chose a quick wash up instead of a shower (the reason for the flat and unruly hair) and although I was planning on going shopping for a few groceries, I've decided to put that off until tomorrow.  Chris will just have to go without orange juice tomorrow.  I am so bad.  Then of course I may just go out later.

Lately, I've been busy with many projects and next week I have so many appointments I am tired looking at the calendar.  Maybe that is it.  I am just run down.

Regardless, I think I will make ANOTHER cup of coffee (I usually have only one a day) and hope I don't get "coffee shakes".  But, I feel a need to nurture, to draw inward for comfort.

Comfort.... hmmmm a good subject.   I will attempt tomorrow when my hair is cleaned and prissy, I am in decent clothes and ready to take on the world....and that party we are suppose to go to.

For today just call me Minnie, a drawback from my childhood name.  Because today I feel like nesting and remembering.  I will turn on the fireplace (an electric heater kind) and light some candles and begin my journey into fall.

A Taste of Fall

Here in New England we are looking at a very early fall picking season.  For apples that is.  We had a very warm spring and summer so we find ourselves here in September picking apples, knowing by October there will be only left overs.  It just isn’t same.  Picking apples in shorts is sort of, well, sacrilegious.  No beautiful tree colors of orange, red and yellow.  No fire at the Red Apple farm to warm us as we sip hot cider.  No sweaters and jeans and a crisp in the air that makes you feel like you are blessed to come from this part of the country.  Nope, not this year.

I’ve been married, for a lifetime it seems.  I say that because I have been married longer now than I was single.  So, it  is hard to go back into my adulthood without it actually pertaining to my marriage now.  Although my husband I have a healthy separate personal life as well, it just seems that all those great, warm memories lead back to him. 

Well, let me tell you something when I met my husband I would have never thought I would become the cook I have.  My family was very Irish, very meat and potatoes.  Until I got married I never had a taco (which we lived on the first year we got married) or even a zucchini.  Chris, on the other hand had full course meals, including desserts.  A homemade dessert from my mom was pretty much a purchased graham cracker crust, a box of chocolate pudding and a tub of Cool Whip.  Anyway, you get the picture, very diverse eating styles.  I would argue my husband has a better sense of a balanced meal and found appreciation in all things garden grown.

We got married in the fall and I can remember going to purchase some applesauce to go along with our pork (a left over of the day when applesauce helped in avoiding trichinosis.  Be an old wives tale or not, we always had applesauce with pork).  Well, as I reach you would have thought the heavens were coming down upon my poor husband.  “What is that for?” he ask.  I sort of looked at him funny.  What kind of guy doesn’t know a good jar of Mott’s applesauce?  “I don’t eat jar applesauce”.

God bless my mother in law, she was a regular Mrs. Clever.  She, it turns out made everything by scratch, including applesauce.  I guess the look of confusion was enough for him to remind me of the strange contraption my mother in law made sure I got at my bridal shower.  It was called a “Foley Mill”  (Which, by the way, brings back terrible memories of me trying use the name of this this item in a game where you told a lie or truth and everyone was convinced I was lying.  I lost that stupid game that night because of that dern Foley Mill  I really fought hard to make people believe me)  The Foley is a this bowl type strainer with a handle in the middle which forces the apple meat through these holes, while holding back the skins and the seeds.

So, instead of my faithful jar of Mott’s Applesauce (which I still like) we got a couple bags of Macintosh apples.  So, starts and adventure into making homemade applesauce.  Over the years it begin pretty simply.  Using Mac’s made it so I didn’t have to sugar (a real no-no says my MIL) I proceeded to make homemade applesauce; it really isn’t hard.  I have tweaked the recipe to make it more sophisticated, and hubby actually likes it better.  So, from my New England kitchen I thought I would share my recipe.

Home Made Apple Sauce

About 15 Cortland Apples (which give the applesauce a lovely pink color and a subtle tartness)
10 Mac’s

Remember, this is an approximation, it really does depend on the size of the apples.  I make my sauce in a Dutch oven, and I PACK it.

Oh, you can use any kind of apples.  One year I got a peck (a big bag) of apple "drops" and they actually made a wonderful sauce, but I would never be able to reproduce this because I had no idea what kind of apples were in there!

1/8 c. water in bottom of Dutch oven

Cut apples up, discard core but no need to peel.  I have a neat apple slicer, which can be found anywhere, including the grocery store, which cuts the apple up and separates the core out. It is a push down, push em'out kind of contraption.

Place apples in a large Dutch oven

Cover and start to simmer on VERY LOW heat for about 10 minutes until you can push the apples down a bit, meaning they are starting to cook. DO NOT BURN

Add:
2 T. ground cinnamon
2 T. Apple spice mix (or you can do some “shakes” of allspice, nutmeg, cloves, ginger)
1/8 t. mace (optional) gives a little "kick" to anything apple
pinch of salt
NO SUGAR in my recipe (my mother in law is very proud)!

Add spices after cooking apples about 10 minutes, mix well and continue to cook on low until all the apples are broken down.

Here is where I use a Foley mill and take the broken down mixture and process.  If you do not have a Foley, you can use a strainer and push the meat through and remove the apple skins by hand.  It is messy and doesn’t give the consistency of the food mill.

So, there it is, a little bit of New England in a bowl!  I freeze my applesauce and have it year round.  It taste great and you, too, can “tweak” it to your hearts content.

Her Name Should Be Grace

There are creatures, for you pet lovers, that just seem to touch you.  I had a cat name Randy, given name Random (a long story in which my husband won that battle.  She was not a He!  But he loved the character in the series he was reading from Roger Zelazny) and I had been blessed for her to allow me to be her owner for 18 years.  After that time I knew I would always have a cat in the house. 

The iconic idea of a cat on the bed is from my childhood, where I always had an animal or two to share my life with.  Randy was special and most definitely my cat.  She had been a good and fine companion.

My heart yearned for another.  So, my husband and I began visiting the local Humane Society in search of a kitten.  We had said we would not get another black cat because Randy had been black and we wanted to move our hearts on.  We fell in love with a really different brown cat, but he was a male.  At the time my husband was dead set against males.  So, there was this little black kitten who was mewing a lot and she got my attention.  She was friendly and so home we went with another black kitten. 

Now, Randy did not really meow until she was almost a year old. She did make a noise but it was sort of a Ma-uck sound.  I know that this strange but I have been told there are some cats that don’t need to meow, they are just content and that is that.  Not this new one.  She was mewing all the time.  At first I thought there was something wrong!  We showed her cat box, which towered over her.  She must have thought it was a cage because she was resistant at first to leave it.  She leave, go a few feet, mew and run back.  She did this for a good hour and a half until she got far enough away to see Chris and I in the other room. 

She “talked” all the time.  When she wanted something, when she was happy, when she played, when you sneezed (no, really!).  I mean all the time.  Now I have heard of dogs who like to “talk”, Schnauzers being one of them.  They like the last word, but I had never had a cat like this.  Turn’s out there were other things I would never experience before too.  She is extremely clumsy.  She didn’t walk with the charm and ability of any of my past cats.  She knocked things over.  She jumped okay, but was never sure where she would land.  You could see this expression on her face of maybe not terror, but of “OH BOY”.  Jumping down she would climb down as far as she could and then plop on the ground with a thud, not with the svelteness of a cat, but the thud of a dog.

As she got older it seemed she might have had eye issues, but that was dismissed as it became evident that it was certainly a brain perception issue.  She patted the water in the bowl to try to judge the distance, only to sometimes dunk her nose in it.  She mastered that after a few years but there were many years she would dip the paw and splash, dip the paw and splash it again. 

She was so tiny at first.  She developed what my Vet called an “Apron” her tummy sagged like a cat who has had a dozen kittens.  When she would lie down she spread out like a cat weighing five times more than what she did.

It was some where along the line I realized she had not one mean bone in her body.  She never growled (although she does yowl at the other cat we now have that takes much pleasure in terrorizing her)  scratched, never bit, and when she did purr it was usually quiet and it usually made her gag!  She was just a good soul.  She loved to snuggle with my husband on his chair and would climb up on his chest for loving.  Me, on the other hand (hand being the operative word) struggled when anyone came at her face first (because of the brain issue) and would back off when you were about to love her.  Thus began the beginnings of “tootsie lovin’.”  One day she was mewing and wrapping herself around my legs as I sat in my chair.  It was at this point I started to stroke her with my sneakered foot.  Low and behold she just adored this.  She would come whenever I tapped my toes when I sat and I would stroke her sides.  She was in nirvana!  I would take off my shoes to do around her head and this became our ritual, and still is.  Where I could not approach her face forward (she was fine when I petted her from behind her head) she thrived and accepted “tootsie” love, and in fact insisted on it with continued meows.

Each pet I have had I have learned more about myself than about them.  They have brought out different parts of me.  Here was what at best could be called a special needs cat and she was mine.  Then again I have my own special needs.  She was devoted and so am I.

So I sit here while I watch her curled up into a ball.  If I “mew” to her, she will “meow” back.  I know we have a connection.

What began as a joke because of her lack of cat like abilities, Grace became a state of being about her.

“yeh, mentally”) by God.  She was meant for me and I was meant for her.  She is Grace.

When I Retire....

Yesterday my brother in law and sister in law got together with us for dinner.  We got to speaking about retirement.  They have plans of travel, here there.  It was when he asked Chris and I why we never talked about what we want to do with or in our retirement.

Well, being disable sometimes I think I have a mindset that I am somewhat retired.  Only thing being that my physical issues stop a whole lot of things I might have chosen to do had I been healthy enough to choose them.  I don’t look at my retirement basically because I feel that I am living my life to the fullest now.  I know when my husband retires we won’t have a ton of money to do all the things we can now.  Nor can we depend on me having the health to do it.

Truth be told, both my parents died when they were 56 and for years they said they would do this or that (most was traveling) when they retired.  Now, those might have been pipe dreams on their part because my family was very  blue collar worker.  But, what came through to me in the long run was neither did reach that goal.  So, those experiences were never felt, never shared, never cherished.  I decided a long time ago that I will “make hay” while the getting is good and ease into retirement in a peaceful, non-gotta do this or that mindset. 

I am not one that cares a lot about cars (as long as it is dependable, good for me!) or the latest gadgets.  I am patient about getting things done around the house. I look at like this, we are never going to leave this home unless we have to sell it.  So, there is time to paint or whatever, whenever we can.  We enjoy the weekends and do maintain the house well. But, nothing is urgent or not livable.  I am not a home fashion diva (although I do like to read about it) and when a project is taken on (like the bathroom a few years ago) it will very often replace any vacation we were going to take.  But, that is okay.  Extravagant, we are not. Although, Chris may not agree about my spending habits on this.

I suspect we will be two homebodies who like to window shop, go out to lunch and spend time reading.  I just don’t have a lot of expectations, with the exception of slowing way down physically, emotionally, financially.

I drive my husband nuts with certain things.  I have a passion for books and it bothers the dickens out of him.  I spend too much time getting books in the mail.  I like clothes a little too much (even though this year most of my clothes were from the church rummage sale).  I like to buy spices to cook with.... the cabinet is full of them.  I do use them, but when you use them a tablespoon at a time, they don’t go away very fast.  Those little Tablespoons of spices are my little adventure in the unknown.

Taking this position has taken a lot of pressure off me and my new “bucket list” which has reasonable, attainable things I would like to do.  Like go to Martha’s Vineyard.  Heck, I am a New Englander and I have never been to the Islands.  Or Bar Harbor (or shall I say Baa-Haba) for more than 6 hours.  Learn to paint in oil (which has taken some expense on our part), write my own cookbook.  Although, after going through and putting together the church cookbook, I wonder about this one.  Maybe enter more recipe contest. Continue to write that paranormal Romance Mystery I have 5 chapters into already.

Nothing big... no Alaska, no Europe, no cross country.  To retire for me is to “be” content where you are at that stage of your life.  You no longer have much disposable income, you have to visit the library more if you have a hankering for more than a couple magazines, looking for coupons for lunches (although I do that even now!).  Simple, simple, simple.

I am not sure what my brother in law meant when he asked the question.  There are two philosophy of thought.  One, you save, save, save and sacrifice now or two, you be reasonable and enjoy now.  I think it bugs my husband that we will not be in a great condition financially, but I believe we will be in a good one.  With economy, the Social Security issues, who knows.  But, you cannot live your life NOW for retirement THEN.  I don’t mean that you don’t save and try to prepare.  I mean the sacrifices in your life should come at a time when you would expect them.  A time when I know I will neither have the energy or drive to do much more than enjoy my patio and go out for a pizza once in a while. 

Am I overly optimistic? Am I not optimistic?  I suppose one could make an argument for both.  All I know is that for now I am pretty sure I have tomorrow and I am grateful for today.  So, based on that I will save and prepare for another cruise, a trip to Florida and perhaps one of those bucket list trips.  Nothing grand, something just right for both of us.

Except for saving (and yes hubby and I don’t agree on this either) I am bound and determined to live life in the here and now.  I am going to smell those roses along the way now and pray that they will be there 15 years from now when I will be appreciating them even more.

No, nothing big planned for retirement for us.  Just being, living and counting our blessings and maybe an occasional hamburger from the Chili’s down the street, with a coupon, of course.

I have thoughts!

I started this blog to reflect.  Taking the big jump into the unknown wondering if I or anyone could benefit from these meanderings.

Today I am going to talk about family.  I personally know how I feel about family, what about you?  I lost all my immediate family starting at a young age (my eldest brother died at 24 when I was 12).  There began a tumble effect of deaths until I was about 24.  My father, my mother, an aunt who was like a second mother. 

I read how often (Facebook) the drama that is in young people's lives today.  Drama of their own making and yet none the less, still painful for them.  With wisdom of age, comes the appreciation of even one day where you could interact with a long gone parent.  Had I been so stubborn and dramatic?  Maybe.

I see where people pour their heart out on an open forum, thinking that no one ever see's or creates an opinion.  I recently had seen a post of a certain young person, which shocked me.  Out there was the anger and hurt that only a parent can feel, from the perspective of a 15 year old.  It was horrible.  A picture was painted of an ogre that loomed over this child like a scene from a Charles Dickens novel.  A private moment, and painful I expect was out there for the world to pass judgment on.

Dear ones, I appreciate this forum of open talk via facebook, myspace, blogs etc.  In fact as in my title "I have thoughts" I encourage one who feels that they may open a door for someone ... go for it!  But there are risk.

We all have responsibilities when we write.  Are they moments better left in the filing cabinet marked "personal" or is this something that should be shared.  What is to be learned or gleaned from the writing?  What is the purpose and meaning of those words to another human being.  Are they for humiliation, fear, bullying?  Then leave it alone and leave it between you and whomever.

With these new forums should come self control, but most often I do not see it.  Too much information is put out there for all to see.  Like laundry flapping in the breeze, with a message on each piece that hangs there...someone is going to see it.  Emotions, raw and new spew like acid.

I guess I am writing this to say that we all have to be tempered.  When we write we need to remember that "it" is out there for the world to see and pass judgment on.  So, what do I want people to see?

I don't mind posting emotions and feelings but they are controlled feelings.  Not when I am red hot mad, but when I can write like someone who cares what is read about me.  I self edit.

One last thought, if it will hurt another, don't do it.  If it is petty, small and common, drop it.  It takes a much bigger person to take a situation and reflect upon it without the bow and arrow in hand.

What Kind of Friends?

When we have friends we have expectations of loyalty and trust.  But, there comes times in our lives where we interact with “different” kinds of friends.  I am talking about the friends who are not the life time ones, but the ones that drift (if we are lucky) in and out. I’ve identified several categories where there have been people I have called friends at one time or another.  Not all relationships last but they happen anyway.  I use the term “friend” quiet loosely

1.  The Emotional Vampire.  Oh yes, vampires do exist!  These are the people who come into your life and expect to be the center of your world.  Only problem is they cannot reciprocate that feeling.  They go on for hours talking about themselves and their lives, sometimes not letting you get a word in.  They call you when they are in the depths of despair for your council and comfort.  But, are nowhere when you need that in return.  They make dumb decisions and ignore you when you call them on it.  They want unconditional love and acceptance and expect not to give it in return.  They literally suck the life and love out of a friendship because at some point you have nothing left to give and you feel wiped out and sometimes used by the end of this “friendship”

2.  Toxic Friends.  These are the people who would not use a positive statement in front of you to save their lives.  You think you can be a positive influence on them.  You try to point out life isn’t all bad.  Drama is something that keeps them going, and that can put you into a depression.  These people need to find the good life that there is to be found out there.  Nothing you say really phases them, but you learn to take it on the cuff.  These people can continue to be casual friends, but keeping them in your inner circle will make start thinking negatively yourself.

3.  Friends of chance.  These are the people you meet during an event, exchange emails, phone numbers.  You find a common interest and go from there.  They could be people you work with, bowl with etc.  They are people that share your friendship in very specific times and occasions.  They are supportive, but not really into your personal life.  These are ones when you ask how many friends do you have.... they will say thirty or fifty.  Realistically can you be intimate with 30 or 50 people?  I know I can’t

4.  Friends that Visit.  I say this because there are times we can become close to an individual because of trauma or need.  They are in need of comfort and relationships.  They do not intend to drift out of your life but they do.  Often it is because they have needed you for a time and after that time they feel a comfort about moving on.  These types  of friendships can be wonderful and yet painful when that someone moves on.  Take heart, you were their rock for a time when they needed it most.  These are the friends that were caterpillars that turned into butterflies.  You were meant to be together for a time (or a “visit”) to grow, walk side by side and then to move on.

5.  Inner Circle.  If you are fortunate you have an inner circle of friends which you see and speak to often.  They are the “gang” you hang with.  I belong to a gang called the “crazy 8’s”.  We love to do long weekends when we can, entertain each other, celebrate Christmas with each other etc.  I have found that the circle can usually be no more than ten  After that you cannot fully invest enough of yourself to each person to develop the kind of relationship that this entails.  We are the fun people who love each other and each other’s family.  They bring joy into your life (along with extended family)

6.  Topical Friends.  Now, I must explain this because it seems like a strange term.  Of my inner circle there are friends I am close to for specific reasons.  One because she is a childhood friend and I love her dearly.  We have been through so much and she knows every aspect of my life from a child on (the losses, the joys and the pressures).  One is actually a relative (husbands cousin wife) who has adopted me into her family and I have become one of them (which I love, having very few of my own family), one is a confidant and a rudder who advice is always sound and I respect her and care what she thinks of my life, she is a second conscience.  There are others outside the 8’s that I hold dear as well.  They are family, wives of friends, wives of my husbands friends, and that includes my mother in law.

7.  The Beginner Friend.  My hubby has the ability to assess what I call his “total friend quota”  It is pretty clearly defined by limiting the inner circle to people where he can keep up with their lives and they keep up with his.  There are some friendships beginning in our church family.  People who we feel connected to and really enjoy being with them.  These relationships are relatively new to us and they are quickly becoming near and dear.  They will  be another circle of friends.  Just not as crazy as the “Crazy 8”!

8.  Everyone else.  Daily we interact with people.  In a generic way I consider all people of value and well yes, friends.  Just not on the level of my other friends.  People at the store where you shop and they know your name.  Or the library personnel who puts a book aside for you because they think you would enjoy it.  They are people who do a kindnesses, but are  casually in your life.

Yes, we have all kinds of friends in our lives.  Today I wrote on Facebook to a young person what I thought friends were:  True, honest, trustworthy, loving, selfless, giving, kind, those are the things that tell the quality of a person, girl or boy. Okay off my soapbox now.

Young people are still finding their way through all the types of friends they have.  Often the distinction is difficult for them.  To say to someone a friend lifts you and doesn’t put you down is true, but oh, how so often young people do that.  They do not have a good sense of their own value as well.  They do not deserve to have negative people in their life, but they must try out all circumstances.  As with myself (as an adult) I have found that it has been painful at times, but I can put it into perspective.

It is true a friendship shouldn’t be painful.  It should be sustaining and loving; Uplifting and encouraging.  Anything less is not what you deserve.  Once you realize you are a person of worth and value, you begin to realize that that is the kind of person you want to surround yourself with.  Not that friends never disagree or fight.  But, it is generally in a way that is not demeaning and demoralizing.  It is without drama and hurt is NEVER intended.

Sometimes, it is not only the youth that has problems distinguishing these issues!  If you are in a relationship with someone it is good to identify what kind of relationship it is so you know the expectations. 

Giving you my “friend” breakdown...let me put it to you.... “What kind of friend are you?”

The Rains of Spring

Yesterday the were several thunderstorms which passed the area.  I was leading a group of women in a bible study about "Boundaries" as the rain came down in pellets so big the sound was making it difficult to talk.  So, we stopped for a moment.  The trees were blowing pink petals against the windows and a cool breeze was flapping the blinds in the window.  As quick as it started it ended.

Outside the air smelled fresh, like spring.  Not like the summer which pulls down the smell of pollution, but fresh like a breeze off the ocean....40 miles from the beach.

Ah, wouldn't it be wonderful if the rains could cleanse us like it does the earth?  Instead we hold on to all that life sticks to us, clinging like grime under a fingernail.

Truth be told, I LOVE thunderstorms.  The power, the cleansing.  It is symbolic for me.  As a child we are told the old tale of "angels bowling", or maybe that is a New England thing.  In trying to comfort, we create an illusion that is non threatening.  In our young spirits we hope that it is angels (who mean us no harm).

Life is like a thunderstorm.  We go through times where we are tossed and thrown, when we cannot get our footing.  After the storm there is something to treasure.  We've experienced the fear and now we see on the other side there is hope.

Hi ho all! I have named this blog because I am a woman who is highly creative and I love to explore all aspects of the creative life.

I will talk about writing, reading, food, cookbooks, life, death, joy and family

A little bit of everything for the creative woman, mom, sister, aunt and daughter


Ginny (Mia Burke)